There is so much more I want to post than just a general update, but our youngest’s Sensory Processing Disorder has been in overdrive, so a general update will have to do for now, but I cannot wait to share what has been on my heart very soon! I’m still working on that Video Blog, too! I know, at this point you’re thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it!” LOL That would be a totally fair thought! So, all I can say is yes, you’ll believe me when you see it!
Love is not rude. This was a little hard for me. It wasn’t hard for me because I have a hard time not being rude, it was hard for me because I had to ask my husband to tell me three things that cause him to become uncomfortable or irritated with me. I’m not very good at asking for constructive criticism. If you remember in my first post about The Love Dare I have Borderline Personality Disorder, so I am very sensitive to criticism (this is something I’m prayerfully working on), so to ask for it was definitely out of my comfort zone! I had to take a few deep breaths and remind myself that no matter the answers my husband is sharing out of love and it’s a chance to improve so as to not become defensive (which is my automatic response). It’s amazing what God can do when you ask for His guidance. I was not only able to listen openly but I also didn’t feel hurt or defensive. This is not only a success as far as The Love Dare goes, but a major success for someone with Borderline Personality Disorder! God is good! I was very happy my husband shared because what he shared wasn’t things that were “obvious” to me, but I can definitely see how it could come off as rude and even disrespectful to him, so I am now conscious of these things! Day 5 was a blessing for our whole family!
Love is not irritable. Love may not be irritable, but I am! LOL No, that’s what this is all about! To love we need to BE love, and love is not irritable. It’s hard not to be irritable when you have kids fighting and nagging all day, outside stress, and everything else that adds up! A lot of this also stems from priorities! I encourage you to read a couple of my posts about priorities such as Chasing the Wind and On the 7th Day where I discussed priorities and taking a day of rest to devote to God and family. Day 6 mirrored my sentiments exactly! It discussed how the Bible helps us avoid unhealthy stress and let love guide our relationships. What I had written in those posts is what has personally helped ME prioritize this because I did realize prior to this challenge that having certain priorities and not having the day of rest really was causing me to be irritable towards my family. My family (particularly my husband) should be my priority – not the brunt of my irritation! There’s so much more I want to touch on that was on my heart while reading and praying over Day 6 that will surely come in my more detailed posts!
Love believes the best. It’s easy to point out all the negatives about our spouse, isn’t it? What about the positives? Have you thought about them today? Actually take the time to think about and thank your spouse for the positives today. It’s easy to do, but it’s also easy NOT to do. Take the time to do this today! It really is a refreshing experience! One thing that really struck a chord with me – the only reason you should even think about the negatives is to know how to pray for your spouse. That’s it. Not to hold it against them. Not to dwell on them. To PRAY for them. Have you prayed for your spouse today? Have you thanked them for something today? I encourage you to do both!
Love is not jealous. Jealousy is a tough topic, and definitely not one I can completely cover in this short update. What happens when you allow jealousy to permeate your marriage? It can be VERY harmful. We do it often without even thinking about it, though! He’s spending time with his buddy, and I’m stuck at home with the kids AGAIN! She gets to go shopping, and I have to change diapers. I think these sentiments are definitely more easily recognized in parenthood (and let’s face it – raising kids can be tough and CAN take its toll), but these situations don’t *just* happen in couples with children, though the kids and diapers part may not apply! Instead of letting jealousy take over – decide to become your spouse’s biggest fan! Let your spouse complete you – not compete with you!
Love makes good impressions. Greetings are so important that they’re stressed in the Bible! When we greet others outside the home we often do so with a smile and hello, but how are we greeting our spouse? A look up from the computer with a simple “hi” (*blush* Guilty!), no greeting at all? How about an enthusiastic greeting at the door so they know we appreciate them and are glad to see them? I’ve decided to change my greeting to let my husband know I appreciate him and am happy he is home. Can I challenge you to do the same?
Love is unconditional. This day’s lesson is powerful. I encourage you if you haven’t already to invest in The Love Dare – whether your marriage is a little rocky or on solid ground – everyone can benefit from this book. Day 10 touches on the different “types” of love. The least practiced is unconditional love. Friendship love (phileo) and sexual love (eros) are both important and necessary to marriage, but you MUST also have unconditional love (agape). Agape love truly is the “in sickness and in health” love, “for richer or poorer” love, “for better or worse” love. It’s the only kind of love that is true love. Again, this lesson was one that really touched my heart, and I will also be sharing more! A good summary is “love is not determined by the one being loved but rather by the one choosing to love.” CHOOSE to love your spouse unconditionally.
I have been taking many notes, and all those I mentioned that have been on my heart will be shared through additional posts, and I will continue to post the small synopsis updates as well! I appreciate your taking time to join me on this journey and please if you have anything to share feel free to do so in a comment (if you have never commented on my blog there is a password to avoid spammers. You do NOT have to type this password in the box below – simply copy and paste it!) or you may always contact me privately or join our Love Dare support group! Have a blessed week!