Is your phone full of pictures of your most prized possessions—those gorgeous kids of yours? Do you need ideas on how to manage pictures of your kids? Currently, my “All Photos” album on my iPhone has 9,618 pictures. About 96 percent of those pictures are of my two boys. Yes, I have to pay for extra storage, and I desperately need to pick my favorites and delete the duplicates. Are you like me and don’t want all those pictures to just sit there on your phone or Facebook timeline never to be seen again? Do you need a better way to manage pictures of your kids? If so, this article was written for you.
Let me start off with a warning: it won’t be easy. The job of organizing and using all the incredible pictures of your kids will take time. But those amazing shots you got of them climbing at the park, wearing an outfit they picked out, braving the waves at the beach, their firsts you don’t ever want to forget . . . first steps, first haircut, first time riding a bike, first loose tooth, first day of school etc., those pictures should be seen again and enjoyed. If you take the time to do something with them now, they will be cherished for many, many years to come. Your kids will thank you for all the pictures they have to look back on and remember favorite moments from their childhood that will one day feel like a lifetime ago.
I know your time is super limited, and you’re probably like me with thousands of photos that you need to stop ignoring. So, let’s dive into seven steps you need to start taking to manage pictures of your kids NOW!
Why it's Important for Kids to Understand the Definition of Friend
From the time our kids are still little we emphasize the importance of knowing all about strangers. Who they are, what you should and shouldn’t do with and around strangers, etc. But what about friends? When it comes to kids understanding friends, there is often this gray area between strangers and friends, which then leads to a gray area on what is OK and not OK when it comes to those that fall in this area. This isn’t a deep, philosophical post about our adult understanding of what is a “true friend” versus an acquaintance. This is about young children. It’s about our kids understanding where that line is drawn between the gray area and friends. Why? Because it often is unclear but it really matters!
As a mom of special needs children, I try to be extra cautious when it comes to strangers, friends, etc. especially with our oldest who is on the Autism Spectrum and has a harder time with comprehending relationships. When we had a scary incident this summer with our daughter, though, who has a pretty good grasp on this (or at least we thought), I realized we’re not always so clear on what a “friend” really is.
We were at the park with a group of friends, and most of the kids were going to play T-Ball. She asked me if she could play with her friends over there and points to where they’re playing T-Ball. She is at an age where it’s OK to go and play with friends, so I say yes, of course, assuming she’s referring to our friends over there. When we were getting ready to leave and I couldn’t find her anywhere, my heart dropped. I was terrified! She was a little farther down with a group of girls I’ve never seen before. Sure they looked like they were having fun, but I was asking why in the world she wasn’t with our friends. When she explained she was with her friends, I was shocked. She just met them! What made her think they were her friends?
Her answer? They were playing on the playground, and they were nice to her.
I fear this misunderstanding was caused by something we’ve also done since our kids were young, and something I often see other parents do as well. In fact, it’s in their books and on TV shows. The message we often send is that a friend is a child they’ve met somewhere and got along with. In fact, I’d even venture to say many shows and books even refer to other children as “friends” just to encourage being nice. Why can’t we encourage our kids to be nice to others without calling them “friends?”
I look back and think of all the times I said, “Did you say bye to your new friend?” Then I wonder why they consider someone they just met their friend? Adults they just meet are strangers but kids they just met are friends? I feel like that’s the message we’ve been sending. What about their parents or whoever they may be with? We don’t know them, and they are still strangers.
We’re so blessed everything was OK, but the thoughts that ran through my head were terrifying. As a parent, it’s hard not to beat ourselves up for mistakes, but we’d be remiss if we didn’t learn from our mistakes – and even the mistake of others. It’s always hard to put ourselves out there, but if my experience will help others realize they may be making a similar mistake, it is worth sharing it.
Kids Understanding Friends
We truly need to think about it. What message are we sending? I definitely learned the hard way we’ve been sending a message that is completely unclear. There is a gray area in between strangers and friends, and it’s important that we make that very clear to our children. Call it what you prefer – acquaintance or even “buddy” (though make it clear there is a difference between a “buddy” and a “friend.”). Then set boundaries on what is OK and not OK with them.
Some healthy boundaries may include things like: It’s OK to talk and play with them while under your supervision, and It’s OK to ask us to talk to their parents about getting to know them better by getting their contact information and planning get togethers. After all, we would ultimately love if they do make new friends!
So what defines friends? Perhaps your definition may be more or less strict as ours, but some general guidelines we’ve shared with our kids are:
- You aren’t meeting them for the first time. Meeting someone for the first time automatically means they aren’t a friend. Friendships (and the trust that goes along with it) aren’t built in a day.
- You know their name (and we know their parents’ names). Our kids aren’t very good at remembering names, so this may not be applicable for most, but if our kids know their names, it means we’ve interacted with them pretty frequently, but it’s important that we know their parents as well!
- We have some way to contact them. Although I’m not a “phone person,” phone is definitely the best contact information to have. Besides, most people can text now! 😉
Whatever you decide works for your family, I can’t stress enough how important it is for kids to truly understand what a friend is and to have appropriate boundaries based on how well you know them. It may seem innocent enough for kids to call all other kids their friends, but it’s important to remember this can be confusing and ultimately unsafe. It’s important to remember – it’s not just about the kids – we really need to know their parents as well!
How do you help your children distinguish between a friend and an acquaintance?
Sleep Well for Kids – Under the Sea CD
Something many families have in common is having a family member who has a hard time falling asleep. Sometimes it’s an adult, sometimes it’s a child, and sometimes it’s more than one family member! In our household, I am a night owl. Not only do I function better at night, but I, unfortunately, also have a hard time falling asleep. Two of our three children are exactly the same!
Under the Sea is a CD to help kids sleep. It offers soothing guided imagery and relaxing music to create a relaxing atmosphere to help children fall asleep. In the CD children are guided through a magical voyage under the sea. During this voyage they are introduced to sea life friends and it contains messages like kindness to animals and a respect of sea life.
In addition to the soothing music and special messages, kids are also taught how to breathe and visualization techniques are used to help them manage worry and relax. I is a way to guide them to wind their bodies down to relax and prepare for sleep.
Overall, I found the CD to have beautiful relaxing music, and I love that it includes guided details for taking deep breaths and concentrating on just relaxing and settling down. I also found some parts, though, to be distracting as a “millions of years” reference came up, which is contrary to what we believe. I don’t think our kids think too much of it, though, so it is probably more of a distraction for me than for them.
Overall, though, I think the soothing music and guided breathing and relaxation are great for helping kids to wind down naturally. If you have kids with special needs like ours, it may take a few tries to create this atmosphere, though, as the first few times our kids were constantly asking questions. Once they understood the purpose, though, they were better able to concentrate on doing the actions it was suggesting.
If you have a little one that could use a little guidance or know someone who does, this CD would make a great gift for Christmas!
For More Information:
Visit the Sleep Well page on the Live Well Website
We got an answer!
Well, after a drawn out wait we finally have an answer. Is it the ONLY answer or just one piece of the puzzle? Well, only time will tell, but I have a good feeling a lot of issues will be resolved. I have often talked about our youngest son’s sleep issues and how he even had a sleep study. We were supposed to repeat a sleep study at home since he was so traumatized by the experience of it. Plus, they didn’t get very clear results. What I had understood was that he did have four episodes where he stopped breathing during the sleep study. The whole ordeal was awful because they truly didn’t understand Sensory Processing Disorder. Please feel free to read the post for the full story. We never did get to do the sleep study and never got a reason.
I also mentioned in that post he also had a GI appointment coming up for a swallow study as well. He had the swallow study in the middle of April. I was unable to take him due to my own medical issues, so my husband took him. Basically, though, it was another case of medical professionals that didn’t understand Sensory Processing Disorder and didn’t care to try. Unfortunately, the doctor also doesn’t like working with children, which he told Joey very plainly. Chaz did not choke or gag during the swallow study, so they said he was fine, and that was that!
So, let me bring you up to speed on Mr. Chaz:
- He has Sensory Processing Disorder. This is something we know, and something for which he receives therapy.
- He has a Speech Delay. Again, this is something we know and something for which he receives therapy.
- He has some nasal emissions when he speaks. This is something we know but the reason has not been determined. It could be a learned behavior, a habit (since it’s something he’s done since he first started using words), or there could be a medical reason.
- He doesn’t sleep well. It has definitely gotten better, but by better I mean he has finally learned how to put himself back to sleep most of the time. He still snores and wakes often throughout the night. He also moves around in his sleep a lot. We got him a twin size waterbed (which is bigger than a regular twin bed), and this has helped a lot because he has more room to move around. Plus it is heated and has motion – perfect for his sensory needs
- He often chokes on drinks and sometimes food. You know how you cough if your drink “goes down the wrong way?” He does that all the time. Sometimes he will also gag or choke on food, but it has nothing to do with texture because foods he eats all the time will randomly make him choke or gag.
On Wednesday we (finally!) had his ENT appointment. Oddly enough, she explained everything I thought I knew about his sleep study wasn’t correct. His O2 levels DID dip but not to where they’d consider it to be a problem. She also said it’s been confirmed his tonsils are a normal size, which was another concern because of both the choking and snoring/breathing during sleep. I instantly felt defeated – like it was going to be another dead end with no answers. But this appointment was already SO different. She believed me! Despite the sleep study paper she believed me when I said he snores and wakes up startled. She was also very patient and understanding with Chaz, and he responded really well to her! So, we went ahead and looked at things with the scope, and we got an answer! His adenoids cause a 75 – 100% blockage. So, this definitely answers the sleep issues!
Could it answer the choking issues? It seems possible. It really MIGHT be going down the wrong pipe if he’s breathing through his mouth due to not being able to breathe through his nose. This is one we’ll have to wait and see. It doesn’t seem to be a soft palate concern, which is one of the issues the swallow study was supposed to address, but she was able to see it a bit and it seems normal.
Could it answer the nasal speech? Possibly. Again, this will be a wait and see. Again, it’s probably not a soft palate concern.
So, the not so fun part? He will be having his adenoids removed in a couple of weeks. Because it’s just the adenoids and not the tonsils, too, it’s a quick outpatient procedure and quick recovery time. He can even go back to eating solid foods the next day! He’ll need to take it easy for a few days, of course, but I know he’ll bounce back quickly. Then, if further down the road the other problems still persist we’ll have a swallow study with a pediatric team that works closely with his ENT. So, although I’m a little nervous about the surgery I am SO glad we got an answer, and I know he’s going to feel so much better when it’s all said and done!