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How to Be Romantic {Even if it's Not Easy for You}

February 6, 2016 by Emilee Evans

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With Valentine’s Day around the corner thoughts of romance are in the air. Although we really should be romantic with our husbands regularly, it’s a good reminder to be more conscious of how to be romantic with them. I know what you’re thinking. “It’s another post from someone who finds it easy to be romantic, and they can’t at all relate to someone like me who has a hard time being romantic.” I know because I’ve been there.
Yes, that’s right, being romantic is not easy for me. In fact, my husband likes to make jokes about how he always tries to be romantic and sometimes it goes over my head. Yeah, it’s that bad. Sure, as a little girl I always had dreams about meeting and marrying my knight in shining armor, and now that I’m here I realize that’s about as far as I got!
So I get it. It’s not easy. I’m right there with you! So let’s start taking steps together to be romantic more towards our husbands.
How to be Romantic

How to be Romantic

Every time you shop get him a little something he enjoys. Even if you have to write “something he likes” on your shopping list – do it. So often they just want to know we’re thinking about them. It doesn’t have to be anything big – maybe his favorite drink or snack. It’s a great way to make them feel special.
Make an MP3 List. The good old days of recording tapes and burning CD’s is gone, but there is always something romantic about making a playlist of your favorite love songs like on Amazon Prime Music. If love songs aren’t your strength, simply put together a playlist of songs you like to sing together or just any songs that remind you of him.
Cook his favorite meal or make his favorite drink. My husband joked that since I hadn’t made him a chai tea in a while it must mean I am not happy with him. Clearly he was joking (if you can’t tell, he jokes a lot), but it really did make me think about it. Making him a chai tea? Really? That’s romantic? Apparently so!
How to be Romantic Make his favorite drink
Show affection. I know this seems obvious, but for us “non romantic types” it can be hard! Showing affection just doesn’t come naturally to me. I acquired a special type of affection when I became a mom, but romantic affection? It’s still a struggle. I mentally have to remind myself to regularly give my husband hugs and kisses, but it’s so important! I challenge you to give him a hug and kiss at every goodbye and hello (and anything in between). You may have even done this early on in your marriage, but it’s a habit that should never die.
Send him pictures. No, I don’t mean those type of pictures (or at least they don’t have to be…). Get out the selfie stick and take a few selfies to send him when he’s out of the house. Even if you feel you don’t look your best, he will appreciate that you’re thinking of him.
Send him a letter. I know this one may sound a little strange if your husband isn’t away, but it’s a romantic way to express your feelings. We both still have all of our letters we wrote back and forth when he was in Basic Training, and we truly treasure them. We expressed our feelings through those letters better than we do with words in person. I think particularly for those of us that do struggle with romance, it is easier for us, in particular, to express ourselves in this way. So give it a go and maybe even spice it up with a scent you wear.
How to be Romantic Send a Letter
Go on a special date. We have been so blessed to have regular date nights since moving back to Ohio. What has happened, though, is we don’t always do anything fancy. We might go to the store (kid free shopping! Yay!) or dinner or maybe even a movie. Go on a special date, though. Get dressed up, do your hair and makeup nicely and do something special – even if it’s just around the house!
Pamper him. You know how we love to go to the spa? He probably does, too (but might not admit it)! Give him a massage, rub his feet, etc. Use some of your favorite essential oils for relaxation. Use all the things you have to pamper yourself to pamper him!
Ask him what he likes. There are so many ways to be romantic, but maybe you don’t know exactly what your husband finds romantic. That’s OK. It’s also OK to ask. Communication is key, and sometimes the best way to know how to be romantic with your husband is to simply ask him what he likes. You might be surprised what he says, and it may end up being easier than you think!
 

Messy Beautiful Love {Book Review}

January 11, 2015 by Emilee Evans

There is so much information out there about love. There are even amazing Bible verses about love. Sorting through it all can be confusing. Love isn’t always easy. In fact, sometimes it’s hard – and messy. We have to make a choice – a choice to surrender to God and clean up the messes His way.
Messy Beautiful Love
Disclosure: As a Family Christian Blogger I received complimentary product to facilitate my marriage book review. Regardless, all opinions are my own. This post contains affiliate links.
Family Christian offers a variety of great faith-based products including this amazing Christian Marriage Book – Messy Beautiful Love.
About Messy Beautiful Love:

“Messy Beautiful Love” delivers an incredible testimony of grace that offers hope for today’s marriages and a spark for rekindling love.
Love gets messy.
Financial problems, sickness, aging parents, a chronically unhappy spouse . . . trials will inevitably come that threaten your marriage. No matter how long you’ve been married or how strong your relationship is, sooner or later you are going to have a mess to clean up.
“Messy Beautiful Love” is about cleaning up messes God’s way, exchanging your ideas for His, and being prepared for both the best and the worst that marriage has to offer.
When you surrender your relationship to God, then and only then will you experience the blessing of marriage as He intended. This is the blessing of obedience. “Messy Beautiful Love” is an invitation to that obedience. The cynical world says marriages don’t last, but God knows better. Tune out the world and tune in to Him. When you do that, a beautiful marriage is not only possible, it’s inevitable.

For my review I received a paperback copy of Messy Beautiful Love.
Messy Beautiful Love Christian Marriage Book Review
If somebody would have told me my husband would get cancer at age 25 and that it would have returned less than a year later followed by chemotherapy that would cause complications that would leave him disabled, I would have said that is extreme! If I knew I was going to go from an active, athletic person to someone with chronic pain who sometimes has days I can’t function, I would have said “no way!” The truth is, though, we don’t know what’s ahead of us, and when we take those vows, we commit to better or worse, and sometimes it can be more worse than better! Sometimes those messy parts of life take a toll on not just you but your marriage as well. There was a time I thought my husband would leave me, and though I don’t like to admit it, there was a time I wanted to leave him.
We know marriage DO last, though. We know God can get us through the hard times because He did get us through the hard times, but what about when you’re in the middle of it? It can be hard to see that, right? Society says just leave, but God says obey. I love that author Darlene Schacht has really dug in to this topic and opened up her heart and life to inspire and encourage others in their marriages.
What I love about Messy Beautiful Love is the sheer honesty. It can be so easy to read a marriage book and roll your eyes and say “you have no idea what it’s like to be in a hard place in your marriage.” Darlene doesn’t hold back, though. She is very open so we can instantly know she does understand. She shares her mentality and mistakes, which I know can be difficult, but I am so thankful for her obedience in sharing so openly because Messy Beautiful Love is a beautifully written book that can truly bless marriages.
In Messy Beautiful Love Darlene walks us through truths and obedience that can sometimes be a hard pill to swallow like communicating with love and respect, giving up your right to be right, and being content in the life we’re given. We’re also reminded to pray for our marriage, building a strong friendship, handling conflict wisely, and so much more. I really feel like this is a truly thorough book and filled with valuable topics and encouragement. Whether you are in a struggling marriage or are happily married, we all go through messy times, and I would definitely recommend Messy Beautiful Love no matter where your marriage is currently.

For More Information:

Learn more about Messy Beautiful Love on Family Christian
Visit the Family Christian Website
Connect with Family Christian on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Google+ and YouTube
 

The Song Couple's Devotional {Book Review}

December 3, 2014 by Emilee Evans

My husband and I love doing devotionals together, but something we have been considering is a couple’s devotional. Needless to say, I am so glad for the opportunity to review THE SONG: Awaken Love Couple’s Devotional!
The Song Couple's Devotional
Disclosure (in accordance with the FTC’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising”): Many thanks to Propeller Consulting, LLC for providing this prize for the giveaway. Choice of winners and opinions are 100% my own and NOT influenced by monetary compensation. I did receive a sample of the product in exchange for this review and post.
Only one entrant per mailing address, per giveaway. If you have won the same prize on another blog, you are not eligible to win it again. Winner is subject to eligibility verification.

THE SONG: Awaken Love Couple’s Devotional is a 6 week couple’s devotional designed to help “awaken love” in their marriage. It was inspired by the Song of Solomon and THE SONG is both a full-length movie and resource for churches to explore God’s plan for relationships, love and marriage.
For our review we received THE SONG: Awaken Love Couple’s Devotional. Each devotional is 2-4 pages long. It starts with a Bible verse to read. We both use an app on our phone and I read the verse out loud while he reads along in his Bible app. Likewise I would read the devotional out loud while he followed along beside me.
Following the Devotional is “THE BRIDGE,” which is where we go into questions that challenge us to think about each other, our marriage, etc. and are challenged to do something to improve our marriage. We’ve been encouraged to make a calendar to go somewhere new together, pray together (which we try to do regularly, but this has encouraged us to do so regularly again), and really talk to each other about things – both good and well, not so good. Then each devotional is closed with another Bible verse.
We haven’t had it long enough to finish it yet, but I am definitely pleased with all we have been doing so far. Whether you need to awaken love in your marriage or just need to commit to that time together with God, THE SONG: Awaken Love Couple’s Devotional is a great couple’s devotional. We have been more open with each other and more devoted to praying together and seeking God together more. I know this book will bless your marriage as well!
About the Author:

Kyle IdlemanKyle Idleman is the Teaching Pastor at Southeast Christian Church in Louisville, Kentucky, the fourth-largest church in America. Author of the award-winning and bestselling book, not a fan., and presenter of eight of City on a Hill’s curriculum series, he regularly speaks at conferences and events around the world. Kyle and his wife DesiRae have four children.

For More Information:

Visit THE SONG Resource Website
Connect with The Song on Facebook and Twitter

*Giveaway!!! {Over}*

Would you like THE SONG: Awaken Love Couple’s Devotional? One winner will receive a paperback copy! This giveaway will run through 12/13 at 10:00pm (times are Central) and is open to US and Canada ages 18+. Winner is subject to eligibility verification and will have 48 hours to confirm before a new winner will be drawn. For any questions/concerns please email emilee.roberts@peaofsweetness.com (consider adding this email to your “Safe List” as winning email notification will be sent from this email.)

Entry-Form

 
Pea of Sweetness is not responsible for prize fulfillment.
 

Pulling Back the Shades {Book Review}

November 29, 2014 by Emilee Evans

There is a phenomenon that started a couple of years ago that continues to put a burden on my heart. It all started with 50 Shades of Grey and snowballed into an epidemic of women turning to erotica. It doesn’t seem to discriminate between single women, married women, women of faith, moms, wives, etc. More movies came out to appeal to women’s fantasies including one coming up for the book that started this phenomenon.
I felt crushed. I was devastated that so many women were pulled in by it. The same thing that they say is “helping” their marriage is giving Satan a foothold to destroy it bit by bit – a slow fade. I didn’t know what to say, though. I didn’t know how to reach out with a loving heart and truly show my intentions to protect our marriages and not sounding judgmental.
Disclosure: I received a copy of the book compliments of Family Christian to facilitate my review. Regardless, all opinions are my own.
Pulling Back the Shades
After reading Pulling Back the Shades: Erotica, Intimacy, and the Longings of a Woman’s Heart by Dannah Gresh and Dr. Juli Slattery, I have a renewed vigor to do just that, though – put my heart out there in order to save marriages. It opened my eyes to the dangers of erotica even more than I realized. It opened my eyes to the reason women are drawn to it – our innate desires.
Women have intimate desires. Many of us desire a strong man and a little excitement. Those desires are purposeful – within a marriage. When we take those desires outside of marriage (even in fantasy) we aren’t allowing our husband to be that man we desire. We fantasize about something that doesn’t belong to us and eventually a marriage that may have already been floundering now looks extremely pale in comparison to this fantasy relationship. According to Pulling Back the Shades this progressively gets worse!
Pulling Back the Shades truly speaks to the heart of women – whether you’ve been tempted by erotica, are heavily involved in it, or even stayed clear, it offers amazing insight. What are a woman’s desires? Why does it seem like some are unfulfilled? Are you expecting your husband to fill a longing meant for only God to fulfill? What are the dangers of erotica? These are all questions that are explored and answered.
They did a lot of research and interviewed many people, and it was so insightful, and even a little shocking! Pre-teen girls reading erotica and yes, marriages destroyed by it. They even got a comment from a man who claimed he felt “demasculated.” It’s so eye-opening!
I am still not sure I can write a post that expresses the burden of my heart, but I can definitely recommend this book.
Additionally, Pulling Back the Shades addresses intimacy in marriage. It’s a good thing! God designed it to be beautiful! Things like erotica and even our past taint intimacy in marriage, though.
I am going to be completely open here because I want you to understand the depth of this book. I didn’t come into my marriage pure. I know I am forgiven for my past, and I’ve worked hard to forgive myself, but there is something in Pulling Back the Shades that helped set me completely free – asking God to break the bonds from those relationships. Because it does create a bond from which we need to be freed.
Oh how I appreciate that they opened their hearts and lives! Not only did it help me to be able to experience true freedom, but it also lit a fire for me to share my heart with others as well – to share the dangers of these temptations and encourage marriages! What a blessing!
I can’t recommend Pulling Back the Shades enough! If you’re considering seeing the upcoming movie PLEASE read this first. Even if you have already (or maybe especially if you have already) read 50 Shades of Grey read Pulling Back the Shades. Maybe you’re afraid of what it might say – please read it. It will empower you with information on what it is to be a woman and enjoy Godly intimacy (which is meant to be fun and exciting, too!) with your spouse.
Pulling Back the Shades can be purchased at Family Christian for $11.99.
Stay tuned because I will be hosting a giveaway for a copy of the book as well!
 

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